Proofreading 101: Eagle Eyes and Red Pens
It’s common knowledge that we Nigerians have a…let’s say, “creative” relationship with English. But when it comes to formal writing, suddenly everyone’s scrambling to remember whether it’s “your” or “you’re”. (Hint: If you can replace it with “you are”, go with “you’re”. If not, it’s probably “your”. You’re welcome.)
Now, when it comes to proofreading, the psychology behind the art is quite complex. Our brains are tricksters, you see. They love to play a fast one on us, filling in gaps and autocorrecting errors faster than your phone (on autocorrect) messes up your Igbo name. That’s why you can read “Pls kndly snd d fle” and understand it perfectly, but miss a glaring typo in your own meticulously crafted CV.
So, how do we outsmart our own brains? Here are some Naija-approved techniques:
- The “Danfo Approach”: Just as you wouldn’t board a danfo without checking its condition, don’t start proofreading without the right mindset. Take a break after writing. You don’t need to hit the “Submit button” just yet. Eat some suya, watch a Nollywood movie, or engage in some quality traffic meditation. Come back with fresh eyes, ready to spot those unspotted errors.
- The “Market Woman Method”: You know how market women count money multiple times? Apply that same scrutiny to your work. Read it forwards, backwards, upside down if you have to. Each pass focuses on a different aspect – spelling, grammar, punctuation. By the time you’re done, your document will be as error-free as… well, let’s not get carried away.
- The “Aunty’s Gossip Technique”: Read your work aloud, as if you’re sharing hot gist with your favorite aunty. If you stumble, your reader will too. Plus, your neighbors will think you’ve finally cracked from too much studying. Win-win!
- The “Nollywood Director’s Cut”: Print out your work and attack it with a red pen like a Nollywood director cutting unnecessary scenes. Be ruthless! If a sentence doesn’t add value, chop it like bad meat.
- The “Nigerian Police Checkpoint”: Set up mental checkpoints in your reading. Stop at every paragraph, every sentence, even every word. Scrutinize them like a police officer checking “particulars”. Your document should fear you!
Remember, effective proofreading goes beyond finding errors; it also encompasses training your brain to see what’s actually there, not what it expects to see. It’s like developing a sixth sense, but instead of seeing dead people (hoping Bruce Willis doesn’t see this), you see misplaced commas and rogue apostrophes.
And here’s a final tip, proofread like your life depends on it. Because in Nigeria, it just might. Imagine sending a job application with typos to the CEO of a leading Fintech company, like Kuda. Or worse, a love letter to the girl of your dreams with their name spelled wrong. The horror!
I’ll leave you with the immortal words of every Nigerian parent ever: “Read it again!” Because in the end, the difference between “Let’s eat, Grandma” and “Let’s eat Grandma” could be a matter of life and death – or at least a very awkward family dinner.
